My hands are still shaking as I type this. Minutes ago I did a 10 minute reading for a woman who is being brutally battered. I knew before she said a word. I knew before I even drew the first tarot card. I could feel pain all over my head and shoulders. It was her. Her soul was reaching out to me over the phone lines and telling me what happened by sharing her feelings.
The details of her abuse are private. But, having felt what she went through emphatically, I felt like I had the right to tell her, “Leave. Leave as soon as you can and save yourself.” She wasn’t asking if they would reconcile. She wasn’t asking if he loved her. The question she asked will haunt me today and maybe even tomorrow because it breaks my heart.
She asked me, “Will I ever be happy?”
I am a an intuitive counselor. I am not a psychologist or a psychiatrist. I am not a domestic violence counselor. But I am a domestic violence survivor. Almost 10 years ago I escaped a relationship that was so violent and abusive that I had to escape to a domestic violence shelter in order to begin my physical, mental, emotional and spiritual recovery. In the safety of that shelter I learned about the Cycle of Abuse.
It was clear to me that the poor woman reaching out to me for advice was in between stages 2 and 3. My first thought was to advise her to seek counseling immediately and then, we spent the rest of our time sharing experiences. The cycle repeats itself until the victim leaves. The hardest thing I had to tell her was that most batterers don’t ever change their behavior. With that said there was a pause on the other end of the line before she asked me the question that put me into tears, “Will I ever be happy?”
If you are in a situation wherein you are being abused by your partner please get help. http://www.thehotline.org/